Depends on the way you do it. Yes, for some people casual sex just isn’t for them. So why not just say that you don’t want to do casual sex? If you feel completely positive about it, then by all means say it! Or…if you just simply can’t go through with it, just say no! But saying no to people who have positive vibes about casual sex. Or you know what, just don’t say anything!
That doesn’t necessarily mean you’re not single or ready to be in a relationship.
Just because casual sex has not only been legitimized in recent years, but veritably been made the social standard, doesn’t mean that it’s always super healthy. The ubiquity of porn, media examples, and above all, the swiping model of dating apps have all contributed to a society where hookup culture can be the default — “If having sex was once taboo, not having it is today,” says Washington Post columnist Christine Emba in her book Rethinking Sex: A Provocation. This pressure to hook up can lead to having — and even seeking out — sex when you don’t really, genuinely want it.
But that isn’t to say that casual sex is itself a problem — approached properly, if anything, it can be and is empowering, liberating, and most importantly, pleasurable. The key is knowing that you’re in it because you want to be (pun not intended), and you’re aware of and prepared against potential consequences, like catching something (be it feelings or STDs). So long as that’s true, you should go forth and get laid.
The dedicated hookup app is the horny person’s vessel for hot instant gratification. But the cool thing is that most dating apps can be used for sex purposes these days. Where you decide to go to find your casual fling really just depends on how much you’d like to know about the person in your bed. The butterflies of meeting someone new are still there — they just might be happening in a different region of the body.
Is casual sex bad for you?
Depends on the way you do it. Yes, for some people casual sex just isn’t for them. So why not just say that you don’t want to do casual sex? If you feel completely positive
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As a hookup app, mainly used for sex, it lets you find someone who is already motivated to have sex. You don’t have to flirt or kiss — just say you want to have sex and you’ll meet up with the person who wants it as much as you. App Pickers: I actually use tinder just for that reason. They’re quick, can chat on the site or call and text to set up a time, easy to hook up with, and are obviously not looking to date.
Is there a problem with casual sex?
But not all drugs work the same, and not all of them are completely harmless. It doesn’t matter if you’re 21 and into Ecstasy when you’re drunk, or older and into ice. However, that last one is where casual sex can be a problem. The chances of getting hepatitis C from sex without a condom are higher than ever, and there is a small, but notable, percentage of men who are infected.
If you find that you are falling for your casual hookup, it’s time to cut it off and move on to a person who seems more like a real potential. You can tell that the feelings you have for the casual sex are something you want to follow through with, so work on making a big decision.
How to find a casual fling:
Casual sex is something every woman should consider at least once, but as with everything, it’s best to be smart about it. The key is, as we have discussed before, to be in a place to give good, honest, thoughtful consent.
It’s also about understanding who you’re talking to. If someone you meet up with isn’t completely over their last long-term relationship and still sees their partner as someone to keep in the loop, don’t hook up with them. This only happens when someone isn’t being honest about their situation.
If you hook up with someone, you’re trusting them to not treat you like any of the other guys they’ve been with before. They’re now in control, so they need to treat you like a person who is in control, too. Start by asking for the time and place to get together, and ask whether they are ok to text you or whether you need to come over. If it seems safe, then roll the dice and it’s up to you.
This will help you to not feel pressured and to not feel guilt or other feelings that may come with hooking up with someone you aren’t really into.
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